Friday, July 23, 2010

The Only Way is Up? Part 1


I was going to submit this to the Tall Person’s Club magazine, but I feel that it’s not really suitable for that, plus people I know might actually read it there...

Arianne Cohen, in The Tall Book, talks about “dating down” i.e. a taller woman dating a shorter man. When I heard her speak, she was going out with a shorter man, after going out with someone taller. The problems for tall dating are thus: a woman of 6'2 is taller than 97% of the population, thus only 3% are taller than her. Of these, some are going to be taller women. A proportion of the rest of the men are going to be married, in a relationship or gay. Or simply not interested in taller women. Then, she says, you can cross most of the rest off for not having the qualities you might want in a man. Which leaves you with not very many left. Of course there is an advantage to dating someone shorter – you're less likely to have very tall children, for example. But then again, just because you date someone taller, it doesn't necessarily lead to you having much taller children (if any at all!).

Perhaps I am prejudiced, as one person calls Arianne in her book. I may be one of the few tall girls who have always “dated up”, but that's always the way it has been. I tried to explain it the other day to a friend of mine. I used the analogy of a clothing store. I often don't go into ordinary clothing stores, as I don't expect to find anything that will fit me. So, if I went out on an ordinary evening, I wouldn't normally expect to find a tall man. And I would ignore the shorter men, in her words I don't “see” them. I mean no disrespect to shorter men, it's just that they simply do not interest me in that way. They don't “fit”. So, I came to the Tall Person's Club in the same way I go to a specialist clothing store to find someone who might. I think I have now, we will see.

The problem with tall men is that they often don’t care in the same way that tall women do. They have other objectives, of which I know not, and am unlikely to get hold of. Yes, sometimes it may be that they are unaware that there are tall women out there, or simply that they are scared of tall women. I find a lot of tall men (and quite a few tall women) come to the Tall Person’s Club later on in life, when they’ve found out about it and are possibly more comfortable about meeting taller people.

I feel like I've rambled on too much, so this will be a post in parts.